How Working Outside the Home Can Make You a Better Mom
One of the most common concerns I hear from moms today is that they feel they’re not spending enough time with their kids because of working outside the home. It’s completely valid to want more quality time and to fear missing those fleeting childhood moments.
But here’s what’s rarely talked about: there are real benefits to working outside the home — whether it’s full-time or part-time. Today, I want to highlight some of those upsides, for both you and your children.
Working Outside the Home Can Be Good for You
Having space away from your kids can actually make you a more present, energized mom when you’re home. Work challenges your brain in ways parenting doesn’t always, and that stimulation helps keep you mentally sharp.
It also gives you little windows of personal time — listening to a favorite podcast on your commute, enjoying a quiet lunch, or even using the bathroom without a toddler clinging to your leg. These moments might be small, but they help you recharge.
That said, if you’re a stay-at-home mom, you can absolutely get this stimulation too — through hobbies, social activities, or simply finding new ways to challenge your mind. It’s not where you spend your day, but how you engage with it.
Working Outside the Home Can Be Good for Your Kids
As long as your child is in a safe environment where they’re valued and have access to the things they need to thrive and learn, time apart from you can be beneficial. Whether that’s in a daycare, with a trusted relative, or with a caregiver in your own home, these moments give kids opportunities to socialize, explore, or simply experience someone else’s caring and culture. Of course, not every childcare situation is the same, which is why it’s important to choose a setup you feel confident in and that aligns with your child’s needs and personality. When those needs are met, time away from you can help them build independence, learn new skills, and feel secure in a variety of settings.
It’s About Quality, Not Quantity
Even moms working 40 hours a week still have plenty of time to connect meaningfully. Quality time doesn’t have to be Pinterest-perfect. You don’t need to plan a movie with a themed meal and craft every night–or even most nights–to leave a lasting impact on your child. Often, it’s the simplest efforts that have the biggest influence on our relationship with our parents.
Sing during bath time. Let your kids help make dinner (or watch you as they play). Put the phones down at the table. Let them stay up past bed time just this once for hot cocoa and conversation. Find an audiobook you’re all interested in as your drive to and from activities, or make a special music playlist with family favorites.
Not Everyone Is Meant to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom
I learned during maternity leave that I’m a better mom when I have an outlet for my creativity and energy. That doesn’t mean I love my child less. It means I know what I need to show up as my best self. If you’re the same way, that’s okay. For me, work fills that void, and I have boundaries in place to make sure I maintain a good work/life balance. The “right” choice is always the one that fits your personality, your circumstances, and your family’s needs in that season.
Not Everyone Can Be a Stay-at-Home Mom
While it is totally possible to build a beautiful life while on a budget, the reality is that many families need two incomes to avoid operating in the red. There’s a lot of messaging out there that pressures women to “return to their place in the home,” often framed through the lens of “I did it, so you should too.” While those voices may come from personal experience, they can overlook the reality that every family’s circumstances are different.
For some, living expenses are simply higher than a single income can cover. For us, we could theoretically move somewhere cheaper, but then our children wouldn’t have the same familial support that we value. Perhaps you’re paying down student loans from a degree you worked hard to earn. Or there are medical bills for yourself, your partner, or your child that make a second income a necessity.
Whatever the reason, having a career alongside raising children is a valid — and for many, essential — choice. It can bring a level of financial stability that eases stress at home, which ultimately benefits the whole family. Kids can often sense when their parents are under financial strain, and reducing that stress helps create a more secure, peaceful environment for them to grow in.
You’re Doing Great, Mama
Working outside the home doesn’t mean you’re missing out, even though being a working mama can be hard. In many ways, it can give both you and your child more—more patience, more independence, and more joy. It means that, when you do get to spend time together, it’ll mean that much more. As long as you approach that time with love and intention.
